Running On Empty
by Don Wrege
Three of my more sensitive acquaintances were thoughtful enough to forward the
recent "National Gas Out" spam to me. This mass produced email, written to arouse
the passion of everyman, actually sounded like it was written by an angry owner
of a Sports Utility Vehicle. Yet it was distributed in the guise of a good and
common cause. Welcome to an electronic protest movement.
According to this email alert, all of America is supposed to refrain from buying
gasoline on the 30th of this month to "make a point" with the oil companies. Fuel
is too expensive and wešre not going to take it anymore! But like spoiled kids
going to bed hungry because we refuse to eat our broccoli, we'll all be hungrier
tomorrow and the same gas will sell on Saturday that would have sold on Gas Out
Day.
(Don't Drive Day is really what would catch the oil companies' attention, but
that would mean individual personal inconvenience on the part of the protester.)
The sad fact is over 50% of new cars sold to our unenlightened citizenry
are offensively huge, unnecessarily inefficient gas guzzling status
machines. Bad law allows these polluting land yachts to loophole out
of the conservation and clean air laws that took so many years to pass.
Gas prices are edging up and that giant sucking sound is the SUVsš carburetors.
The reality of the Suburban burn rate has set in.
What to do? Why, we'll organize a protest movement! We'll spread the news on the
Internet! The ultimate civilly disobedient act of the yupped-out nineties, one
where the participant has to do pretty much *nothing.* Nineties activism mouse
potato style. What conviction.
The oil companies are fully aware that when the twenty foot Ford Excursion you
paid forty five grand for runs dry, you'll pay any price for more go juice. Want
to change the world? Buy a bicycle and work closer to home.
Light anyone?
